Reiki from the Farm™
Reiki from the Farm™
April 20 - Reiki for Challenging Conversations with Karen Harrison
In this episode, we dive into Karen Harrison’s insightful article, "Reiki for Challenging Conversations," exploring how Reiki can support us in navigating difficult or emotional conversations with grace.
Join Pam and Karen as they discuss practical Reiki techniques that help calm nerves, ground us, and create a space for more mindful, heart-centered communication.
Whether you're facing tough discussions in your personal relationships or professional life, this episode offers empowering tools and perspectives for navigating conflict with ease.
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Pam Allen-LeBlanc is a scientist, businesswoman, and Licensed Reiki Master Teacher (LRMT) with the International Center for Reiki Training.
Get in Touch with Pam:
Email: pam@reikifromthefarm.com
www.reikifromthefarm.com
Reiki from the Farm Newsletter & Reiki Shares: http://eepurl.com/dFm-19
Karen Harrison is a Senior Licensed Reiki Master Teacher with the International Center for Reiki Training (ICRT) and is the Co-Director of the ICRT's Licensed Reiki Master Teacher Training Program. Besides Reiki, she's a licensed Professional Counselor and Marriage and Family Therapist.
Get in touch with Karen:
Website: https://www.karenharrison.net/
A special thanks goes out to Music from Pixabay for the intro music and to Nate Miller for the meditation music.
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Hi and welcome to the Reiki from the Farm podcast brought to you by me, Pam Allen LeBlanc from Hidden Brook Farm. I am a scientist, a businesswoman, and a licensed Reiki master teacher with the International Center for Reiki Training. Each week in this podcast you'll be entertained as you learn about a wide variety of relevant Reiki topics, helping you become a more knowledgeable and effective Reiki practitioner. We caution you though, this podcast may also dramatically improve your life, and we are so happy that you're here. On this week's podcast, I am talking with my friend and colleague Karen Harrison about Reiki for challenging conversations. That's something I'm not very good at. Karen, thank you for being here. You're welcome. Thanks for having me. It's my pleasure. Before we go too far, I just wanted to let people know about some of the classes that we have coming up April 25th and 26th, which is a Friday and Saturday evening in North America, and it's a Saturday and Sunday morning. In Asia, I have an Animal Communication Level 3 class, would love to have you join us. We also have Health Care Reiki, a class that Tracy Sullivan and I will be offering April 30th and May 1st. In Asia at Lake George Silver Bay, New York, just ahead of the Northeast Reiki Retreat. It, I'm not sure, but it may be the only time we get a chance to teach in person together, so just in case we'd love to have you join us. And then in August And just before the Reiki retreats, August 9th to 13th, I have Reiki Level 1 and 2 and Masters in Campobello. And that's the class, which is just off the coast of Maine on a little Canadian island, where we actually go whale watching on the Tuesday evening after class and before the Master and also August 16th to 20th, we have an Animal Reiki Level one and two and master class. And again, we're going, we'll go whale watching with that. And if you do decide to join us for that, make sure you stay a little longer. Campobello is beautiful. It's the summer home of Franklin and Eleanor Roosevelt and the home of the only international park in the world. So it's definitely worth checking out. So Karen, what do you have coming up?
Karen:I have Reiki one and two classes basically every other month, Reiki masterclasses three times a year, Animal Reiki one and two, two or three times a year, and Animal Master a couple of times a year. So rather than list them all out, just go to my website, which is karenharrison. net.
Pamela:That sounds awesome. Before we go much further, I'm just going to invite all the listeners, if you can, to bring your hands together in Gassho and just bring in any Reiki symbols that you feel guided to bring in. If you have the mental emotional symbol, that's a really good one for our topic today. And I'd just like you to consider some of the difficult conversations that we've had. you may need to have at this moment in time, or perhaps even some that you've had in the past. And sometimes we forget to employ Reiki to allow them to work out better for everyone involved. And so there have been some conversations that haven't gone well. I invite you to use your distance symbol and your mental emotional symbol now, and go back and send Reiki to healing those difficult conversations. If you're a person like me, an empath who doesn't enjoy conflict, you can also use Reiki to release the conflict that may have resulted. And one of the most difficult things is the conversations we have yet to have, but we know we need to have them. They can weigh heavily over us. And so I just invite you to open your heart and hear these words that Karen and I will share with your ears. Listen also with your heart, your mind. your soul, your spirit, and your emotions. And listen with Reiki so that the parts that you need to hear will really resonate with you. Thank you. Aho and Namaste.
Karen:Wow. Thank you, Pam. That was
Pamela:wonderful. Thanks, Karen. Karen, this is something that so many of us, especially when we're empaths, we find this so difficult, these conversations, that when I saw your article on it, I knew we had to expand on that in a podcast. What, can you tell us a little bit about what inspired this article? And, what caused you to write it?
Karen:Sure. It was my lived experience of many difficult conversations all piling up, back to back to back to back. I thought, my gosh, what is the universe trying to teach me here? Thank goodness I'm a counselor, because sometimes I joke that I had to, go to counseling school to learn how to get over the sarcasm and tactlessness that I grew up with in the family, of origin. Is yeah we weren't very good at, difficult conversations was rather harsh.
Pamela:Yeah, families are. Yeah that's a common thing, I think. So
Karen:yes, or the other end, which is just entirely avoiding them and not discussing them. Thank goodness for all my counseling skills and tools, plus the Reiki, which makes all the difference in the difficult conversations. It really does.
Pamela:Can you share a little bit about these personal experiences and how Reiki helped you navigate them?
Karen:Yes. So there, there were so many, let's see, which should I start with? One was negotiating the lease with our landlord and We have a group of about 13 people that I share an office space with. It's a psychology office. And we've been in this building many years. I've been there since 1993. But this landowner, this landlord has not been there very long. And he has a different view for how the building should be cared for and taken care of and, what we should pay than what. our experience had been in the many years before. And we just kept going back and forth with him and ended up finally getting the lease finalized about a month after the new lease period started. Wow. Yeah. I sent a lot of Reiki into that. And then along with that, I have people that sublease my office, and some people that, that are, I wasn't sure if they were going to continue because they were having a hard time paying the monthly rent and that is never a fun position to be in to have to, contact the person and say, when are you going to pay? It was due, a month ago or whatever.
Pamela:And
Karen:then I was starting a lease, a sublease with a Another person who wanted extensive changes to the sublease, and Oh
Pamela:my gosh.
Karen:Yeah, so I, I ended up My immediate reaction was, Oh, grr, and I thought, okay, this is not good. So I just let it settle, Activated Reiki, sent Reiki to it, asked for guidance, Okay, what should I do in this situation? I decided after about two days of letting my emotions calm down, giving myself the mental emotional symbol, I decided, okay, I'll look at the lease and see if I can find any merit for these extensive changes. And I actually ended up making all of them. Some of them were improvements to the sublease. Reiki helped me with that and got that navigated. But I think the hardest one that really hit me hard was a close friend of mine has a daughter who is a former Reiki student of mine. And the daughter became addicted to meth.
Pamela:That
Karen:was just heartbreaking for me. And my friend, kept talking with me about it and sharing and I told her, I'm not an addictions counselor. I don't really know anything about addictions. And I said, I can't be your therapist anyway, because I'm your friend and that would be, a dual relationship.
Pamela:And I'd
Karen:really like you to go get some counseling support because, not only is she addicted to math, but she continues to go back to the abusive boyfriend who got her hooked on math. And, this is a heartbreaking situation as you're watching your daughter who was already thin start to wither away. And, finally I told my friend, I said I love you. She's one of my prayer partners. I'll continue praying, but I cannot continue to hear about this situation until you get in counseling. Because I said, it just feels too weighty for me. And it's just too heartbreaking. And so that was a very difficult conversation, to tell her that I'm sorry, I just, I can't support you. And through that at this time, and I've since spoken with her several times and she said that conversation she did receive in love, I was sending Reiki during the conversation. I'd sent Reiki ahead of time. I had her and her family in my Reiki grid for continuous Reiki and she said that conversation made her realize that this really is too big for all of her family and friends and she really did need to get into counseling. Good. And then so she did and that helped her and now fast forward to about, oh, seven months later and her daughter is lean and sober and back home and out of the abusive relationship.
Pamela:Oh, thank heavens.
Karen:Yes. Yeah. Cause she had gotten down to 89 pounds and I thought, if it keeps going like this, it's, she's not going to last. It can't keep going like that. That's. Yeah. Yeah.
Pamela:Wow.
Karen:So that was just really big, so I was using Reiki and all those things and I was so glad that my friend received that conversation with love. As I told her, I also have too much going on in my personal life right now. I, this is just one of many difficult conversations that have all landed on me at this time, and I said, I need the support. I'm not able to give you the support that I wish I could. And I said, I'm sorry, I don't want to let you down. She's also dealing with her own cancer journey and I've been supporting her through that too. I said, I've reached the end of what I can give to you at this point.
Pamela:Wow, Karen, that's so much.
Karen:Yeah. Thank God for Reiki, like how do people navigate their lives without Reiki?
Pamela:I have no idea. I say that all the time, even in my political run last year, I said, how do people do this if they don't have Reiki supporting them? And just so many times that I say that in the course of a day gosh, how do people with Reiki, without Reiki, how do they do this?
Karen:Yes. Yeah. Activating Reiki before the conversation, sending Reiki in advance to the situation, taking time to tune in and listen, okay, God, what is my guidance in this situation? What do I need to do? How do I need to handle this? What limits and boundaries do I need to set? And how can I do it lovingly so that I don't injure the relationship, because I want to maintain the relationships. Yeah, and then the self reiki every day, to stay centered and grounded even through the seasons of our lives when all the stuff comes up and hits the fan.
Pamela:Why is it happens like that? It always happens like that, that things are going along and then just everything happens all at once, it seems, I think. Yeah.
Karen:That just means. Thank you God for another amazing growth opportunity.
Pamela:That's right. That's exactly what it is. Yeah. And so what are, in your experience, because you've had experience not only personally with your own difficult conversations, and I always admire how you just go in and have the conversations. And, that's something that I sometimes struggle with more. But also as a counselor, what's your experience of some of the biggest challenges people face in conversations that Reiki can help them with?
Karen:So many things. One is, for the conflict avoiders they don't want to have the conversation. They don't want to deal with conflict, so they'll avoid it, but that creates a distance. It creates resentment. I had a client yesterday who had been having conflict with her sister that had been building up over three years
Pamela:and,
Karen:She finally had the conversation, but, to wait three years into a conflict to have the conversation, that's going to be a much harder conversation than if you'd had it sooner.
Pamela:Yeah.
Karen:So I think addressing things sooner rather than later. is good. And then
Pamela:they're heavy while you're avoiding it, or you're waiting to address it. They're heavy.
Karen:Yes. And then making sure that you're centered and grounded when you have it, if possible. I am certainly far from perfect and, I've had conversations where I've lost it. And, done stupid things. And so one of the stories that I was sharing with you as we were preparing was, years ago when I was married and had a conflict with my husband, I'd gotten so ticked off that I went and grabbed his dirty laundry and put it in the kitchen and poured eggnog all over it. It's okay, that, that certainly wasn't a helpful way to go about it. And of course, who ended up having to do that laundry? Exactly. Yeah. One of my big goals in life is not to say something that I'm going to regret. later.
Pamela:Yeah.
Karen:And we certainly all have and done that. And I have plenty, but I've done that enough that I don't want to do that anymore. And so when I get triggered, realizing that I need to take a timeout or a break, whatever you want to call it. Okay. So yeah, so I do that. Quite a bit when I get triggered to say, okay, I need to go take a time out. I can feel my emotions rising and I just think of my emotional intensity and on a scale of zero to ten and if I get to a five or higher, I know that's when it's time to take a time out because beyond that I'm going to slip out of my preparation frontal cortex into the reptilian brain. And now I'm going to lose all of my thinking and reasoning ability and I'm going to go for the blood. This is not going to be pretty and it's going to be a mess and I don't want to go there. Because then that requires so much repair that it's.
Pamela:And sometimes you can't repair it. I can remember that a little fable where they had the little boy go and every time he was angry to pound nails in a fence. And then eventually the father said, now go take the nails out. And the little boy said, okay, the nails are out, but what do we do about those holes? And the father explained you can't repair those. So your anger, you can find another way to deal with it, but if you dam if you do damage, it can't always be repaired,
Karen:then that, that can break trust in the relationship, and it can take a long time to rebuild the trust.
Pamela:That's right. Yeah.
Karen:So trying not to go there, by taking that time and then when taking a time out, it's important to now go give myself Reiki, soothe myself, do something to make myself feel better. Maybe journal a little bit. Go for a walk, center and ground, give myself space before and let whoever I've been talking with, do the same for them, so that they can calm their emotions down, maybe agree on a new time to continue having the conversation, maybe later that day or the next day to try and get it worked out.
Pamela:Yeah, and you would recommend probably not a lot of space in between, it sounds
Karen:at least 30 minutes would be good. If you're having a difficult conversation, and you don't come back to it, within at least a couple of days, people tend to then just try and avoid and it can be easy to go into the avoiding mode. Now we're just not going to talk to each other.
Pamela:Right.
Karen:That can make things difficult also.
Pamela:It really isn't it? You talk about in your article the importance of grounding before difficult conversations. Why is that really important? And can you just explain how you do this, like how Reiki helps you with this?
Karen:Yes. When we're not grounded, we tend to be thinking about so many different things, everybody is so busy these days and say, you're thinking about your work project and the chores and the kids and this argument and so forth. And they're all just circulating around pulling on our attention and grounding helps to call all of that energy back to you. and for the moment you're just releasing it and you're sending it all down into the earth and you can do the grounding with a Gassho meditation or another favorite thing I love to do is a grounding where I inhale energy from the earth up to my head, I exhale, I send it down through my body deep into the earth, breathe it back up, exhale down into the earth, releasing and letting go And again, to the crown, back down, into the earth, releasing and letting go, and that clears the body, and now we're going to clear the aura, which holds all the things that we've been thinking about and doing. Okay, so back up, this time out, down, around the body, clearing the aura, down to the ground, literally just dropping all those things into the earth. Inhale up. Out and around, clearing the aura, down to the ground, and one more time up. Out, down and around, clearing the aura. That's one of my favorite tools. That helps me just to feel cleared, centered. I've let go of everything I was thinking about and doing. Of course I can pick it all back up. Preferably, one at a time or the most important thing first. And not try and all of a sudden oh, now I'm just going to pick it all back up.
Pamela:You
Karen:know, us women tend to multitask and sometimes that can work and sometimes that can be to our detriment.
Pamela:I like, I really that exercise in grounding and, another thing you talk about is that Reiki can help us set an intention for the conversation. Can you tell us about that?
Karen:Yes, okay, what is your ideal goal out of the conversation? Do you want to create connection? Do you want harmony? Do you need to establish a boundary? What is the purpose? And what are what's the optimal outcome for that? So setting that and giving some Reiki to that.
Pamela:And then Reiki can help you accomplish it. And you also talk about using the distance symbol or, and just sending Reiki energy ahead of the conversation for the highest good of everyone concerned. Tell us a little bit about how somebody would do that.
Karen:Certainly just activate the distance symbol and any other symbols that you want, and then I think the first place to start, of course, is with yourself, send Reiki to yourself, and also to the relationship between you and the other person. Because that's an important entity that can get clogged up with hurt feelings, misunderstandings, miscommunications so sending Reiki into the relationship, and then if the other person is open to it, also sending Reiki to the other person. involved. So for example, I had a, Oh, a challenge with a colleague that involved a third person. And I sent Reiki to both of them and the, these two colleagues of mine had a challenge with each other. And somehow I ended up getting roped into it. I was sending Reiki to each of them separately, and also to the relationship between the two of them and listening to both of their, sides of it, and giving them some empathy and understanding, but also saying, okay Here's how I see this could potentially work out and, trying to coach each of them to get it worked out. And it took two months because there were such intense feelings, but they did finally, get it worked out and just, I would check in with both of them periodically to see, okay, how are you all doing with this?
Pamela:Yeah.
Karen:Trying to be the harmonizer in it. Wow. Oh, that did
Pamela:get resolved. That's a lot. And so did you put Reiki into all of the relationship chords? Of course with them and them with each other?
Karen:Yes. And yes. And with the one person, my relationship was already good, but the the one that I was, coaching the most I sent Reiki into my relationship with her because, obviously she was hurt by my stance, but listened to Reiki and. Sought some guidance on it, I, I really thought that she needed to apologize to the other colleague, Ultimately she was able to do that.
Pamela:That's tough to be, pulled in, in a couple of directions like that and be almost in the middle. And yeah you brought up something. One of the things you talk about in your article is active listening. And with animal Reiki, that's something that came in really clearly is just how to listen really deeply and profoundly. And in fact, how can we ensure people feel heard? I've recently done a course with Harville Hendricks, just on his new book, How to Talk to Anyone About Anything. And he actually believes that the antidote, like the answer, that we've got so much. distraction and division politically and in the world today. And he really feels that if we can just listen with love and listen deeply and make sure people feel heard, we have an opportunity to really spread a lot of peace in the world. I've been curious and I noticed that on the campaign trail, people would often tell me they felt heard after I went by. How do you approach that and how do we make sure that people feel heard in these conversations?
Karen:That's a drawing on my counseling skills, I think, because, that's what a counselor does is to try and help a person feel heard and understood. Now that does not mean that we agree with the person, but if a person can feel heard and understood for whatever it is that they are expressing, then It's a lot easier to find a resolution. If a person doesn't feel heard and understood, then it's hard. And, one of the things to do is, as I am listening, activate my Reiki center and try and be present just with what the person is saying, rather than focusing on my rebuttal, my next question, being defensive, having an attitude of being more curious. And there's marvelous material in the Animal Reiki Masterclass on checking your listening skills. Are you listening or are you thinking about what you're going to say next, or the rebuttal? Really hearing and like in the situation with the two colleagues and the one where, I was asking one to apologize to the other, I could tell that she was deeply hurt and felt wounded, and I also could feel that it wasn't just about the situation, that there, There were other hurts and things that were underlying it, because that's one of the things I know as a counselor that if there's a trigger and a person reacts, perhaps much bigger than you might expect for the situation, that means that something old is getting trigger that is also not resolved. And so one of the tools I was using, which is a Reiki tool that I've developed is called timeline therapy. And so I was just imagining, what emotions am I hearing and what emotions am I guessing this person has, and then imagining a timeline from present to the past and sending Reiki along the timeline of the hurt. To work on clearing it not only from the present, but all the way back to the womb, sending it and clearing it. And so clearing the hurt and working on that and then clearing frustration, and then clearing resentment and anger, anger is a more surface emotion. Hurt is always underlying anger and there, yeah, there's hurt and sadness Yeah, anger is more of a surface emotion. The hurt and sadness are what are underlying the anger.
Pamela:Okay.
Karen:Working on clearing those emotions and any other ones. And then also, I like to then clear energy back through the ancestors for the same emotions. And then clear back through past lives for the same emotions. And. Just with the intention, and then that really helps to clear the emotional intensity out. If I'm working with a person live, what I do is I ask them to rate their emotional intensity on an emotion at the beginning of the session and then at the end of the session to see how much progress. we made. So this particular one I was doing, just on my own. Oh, I've written about this in one of my articles.
Pamela:Can you tell us a little bit more about it? I love this timeline technique. We've talked about it.
Karen:Yeah. Let's see. I wrote about it in Transforming Emotions with Reiki, I think, and also Life Challenges. Reiki for Life Challenges, and I talked about it at presented on it at one of the Reiki retreats. Really it's just what I've just said. You activate all the Reiki symbols that you have. We've even done this at the Reiki retreat with people with Reiki two, three symbols. And you think of an upsetting event. And then you think, okay, what are the emotions that I have associated with that upsetting event? And you list them, frustration, anger, sadness, and then feel into it. Okay, what is my emotional intensity now at the beginning, on a scale of zero to 10? Is it a four, a six, an eight, and then you just activate Reiki and just send it. Imagine a timeline from the present all the way to the womb, and then just work on clearing it and then after I clear an emotion, then intend to send the energy back through the ancestors. For the same emotion to clear out any of the cellular memory that we've brought in from our ancestral line and then clear out through past lives to clear out any past life memory that we've brought into this lifetime that might be loading up that particular emotion. So I've had a lot of good success with that. I like to use that technique after I use the Holy Fire Healing experience where the person, identifies an issue and you ask them if this issue were to exist somewhere in your body, where would it be, if it had a shape, a size, a color, so after doing that, then I follow up with a timeline and that's what I use for any kind of emotional upsets, for trauma, for others, I use it on myself. Anytime I come up with any sort of thing that has a charge for me, more than about a two on that scale of zero to 10, then I make a mental note and decide, okay, I need to work on this. And then set aside a time in the next few days to do my own work on that. To clear it out, because whatever emotional baggage we are dragging around with us, then that makes any new things that come up more likely to be more intense,
Pamela:right?
Karen:So the more that we've handled our own issues, the more that we can be centered and grounded and present and not reactive. is really the ultimate bottom line to not, exploding and saying and doing things that we're going to regret.
Pamela:Pouring eggnog,
Karen:whatever. Pouring eggnog. Or here's another funny one. I remember traveling with my daughter in Europe and we were not getting along. We had different agendas for the trip, It turned out and anyway, things had gotten rather difficult. And I remember one day she was saying to me, why, why are you being so quiet? And I said, I'm meditating. And I was just, doing Reiki myself, my prayer was basically don't say anything you're going to regret. And during my Meditation time, a mantra dropped in, and it was Jesus loves my daughter, her name, and Jesus loves me, and so I just kept reciting that over and over to myself, to try and calm myself down, because when you're with the person that you're having conflict with 24 hours a day, it can be a little harder to stay centered and grounded. And I certainly didn't want to say some of the things that might have slipped into my mind that were mean and would be very difficult to recover from.
Pamela:Recover from and rebuild the trust, yeah.
Karen:Yeah. That'd be hard.
Pamela:I love that technique. I've just thought of some place where I want to use it. So I'm going to, I'm going to work on with that. And yeah, you talk about the symbols and tell us how, the symbols in particular can impact these conversations.
Karen:All right. Here is one of my favorite examples. I'll share another story. And that is when my. Mother with her dementia care, it turned out to be a 15 year journey of caretaking her after my father became ill, he had been her caregiver. And we had to take over caregiving her and caregiving our father, and he passed and, she continued on for, I guess it was 15 years after he passed. It, the longer it went on and the more my mother had needs the more challenging it became for my siblings and me. And there was a day when my sister. called me into a private room and I knew that a difficult conversation was about to ensue. So I just got that holy fire symbol all over me, just imagine that as I'm walking down the hallway and imagine that the holy fire flame was there transmuting any negative energy and, just helping me. And I had the conversation with her and I, and as she was, going over her grievances and her anger with me, I was just dumbfounded because I thought, I'm not feeling this. And normally as an empath, I would
Pamela:feel it so deeply.
Karen:Yes. And it would just, be tearing me up. And I was just like, I'm not feeling this. I'm not feeling this. This is amazing. This holy fire energy is really doing a great job of transmuting. And I was so dumbfounded that I almost started smiling, which would've been a very bad thing to do, doing a, a serious conversation like that I thought, wow that really saved me,'cause I. I didn't feel the effects and I was able to stay calm and centered and listen to her. And I'd asked her for some difficult, information that I thought, my siblings and I had a right to and, she was giving it to me, but letting her know, letting me know her displeasure about it. Just an example. And you can do that with the power symbol, imagining the power symbol dropping over you. If you want to, you can even imagine the power symbol dropping over the other person. You can imagine the mental emotional symbol between you and the other person that you're having the difficult conversation with, intending that symbol catch any negativity between the two of you and transmute it.
Pamela:I love this. And you can even use the distance symbol to bridge any communication gaps you talk about in your article as well. How, what would you suggest for people who are conflict avoiders, which is most empaths don't enjoy conflict at all. What do they do? What do we do when it's time to have these conversations?
Karen:You either continue to avoid or have them or you nominate someone else to have them for you. I don't know. It's funny. Sometimes in my my work, people will nominate me to have the difficult conversation. I don't know with the landlord okay, our windows are filthy, what can be done about this the trash is overflowing in the ladies room, and I don't know, the conflict avoiders nominate me, and, I don't know. I will take it on. But, seriously, I think, looking at okay, what is going on in me that I want to avoid this? And, what might be the outcome if I continue to avoid? And what could be the outcome if I'm able to bring it up?
Pamela:Yeah, exactly. So
Karen:sending Reiki. to heal that part that, wants to avoid. I think that's a good idea. Yeah. Yeah. And the Karuna symbols are also marvelous. Oh my gosh. Aren't they the
Pamela:best?
Karen:Yes, and being able to chant them and create, some vibrational healing, to help clear the energy, that, that's great for us. That's, can be great for the other person if they're open to it. I know when my daughter's beloved dog died recently on vacation and, we were sharing a hotel room, all she wanted to do is have me sit by her, give her Reiki, and hand her Kleenex, and she wasn't so fond when I started chanting and toning the Karuna symbols. Here's my weird mom again.
Pamela:It's funny because I love chanting and toning now, and my husband said he loves chanting and toning with Una symbols. And he said, if you'd told me a few months ago after he'd taken the UNA course, that I'd be out here in the woods chanting and toning una symbols to the trees, I would've said you were crazy. But I do know that my son, when I used to teach the classes, he just, he used to get a giggle out of the chanting and toning. Uhhuh Yeah. Love it. You talk about so many other things too, like energy clearing, anything that comes up, and I guess that's something that for conflict avoiders, we, we know that we can just, we can clear the energy afterward if we do step into conflict. I like your idea of holy fire, just making it not such a conflict, like more of an exchange of information, it sounds we talk about using it for self reflection and integration and just using it for insights and that's helpful. And then distance Reiki and if it needs additional and ongoing support. But I love you ended your article talking about above all practice compassion toward yourself and others. involved in the conversation. Reiki teaches us to be kind and understanding, which can transform difficult conversations to opportunities for growth and healing. So I just love that. And how would you direct Reiki toward bringing more compassion into a situation.
Karen:I think first we have to start with ourselves again. I think many of us are hard on ourselves and think, okay what might be my responsibility in this situation? What have I done that, could have contributed to the problem? And and have some compassion for yourself. I had a conversation with a friend over text that the relationship had become distant and I invited some conversation, about, what has happened is there something that I have done that, you're upset about and she wouldn't respond. And so I thought I guess the relationship is possibly over, that's sad, but, I can't force that. So I thought I'm going to try another tactic. And so I texted her, all right, here's the reasons that I have imagined that you have distanced and I made, a few of them serious. And then I made one of them really funny, which was, she had a new boyfriend and was madly in love. And. Focusing all of her time on that relationship. And I made it a little bit spicier than that. But anyway.
Pamela:What happened? Did she respond that time?
Karen:She did. And a little bit. And finally, I found out what it was that she was upset about. And then I had to take that and reflect on that and, and take some ownership for it and apologize and. And realize that, okay, this is something that happened when I was having a health challenge and I wasn't at my best and didn't handle things well and so I, looked at that, but then I also had to look at, all right I think Her assessment of the situation was quite a bit stronger than what I would expect for what happened and, look at I think that part is likely on her and, at this point, the relationship is probably either on hold or over. And, I just have to accept that, I, so I did apologize for what I felt I, I could, and, I sent Reiki and realized that based on prior conversations, I think that this is a pattern that she has of difficulties and relationships. And that's something that will be her opportunity
Pamela:to
Karen:heal if she wants to.
Pamela:Right.
Karen:It's just, it's having compassion for yourself. It's having compassion for the other person and using Reiki on all of it. And, ultimately my task now is just to surrender that, to the higher power, continue to do some Reiki and, continue to, I don't know, just give myself some Reiki over my hurt feelings about. And we do what we can do and and then we have to surrender it and let it go. But Reiki helps us to be compassionate.
Pamela:Yes, definitely. There's a book I'm, I've pre ordered by Mel Robbins coming out and and it's called Let Them. And, just about the fact that we cannot take ownership of or have any impact on what other people do. We have to let them do them, and we have to be focused on them. on our week. The only thing we can have ownership on is our reaction to it. So you reacted in a way that was compassionate to her and also to you. And yeah. Yeah. Wonderful. What is. Can Reiki support both parties in a conversation or is it more about the person doing, doing the Reiki or doing the work? What's your thoughts on that?
Karen:Oh, absolutely. No certainly me as the Reiki practitioner supporting my end of it, doing my own work, sending Reiki in advance. Giving Reiki during the difficult conversation and and then also sending to the other person if the other person is open to it.
Pamela:Yeah, maybe hears your intent and doesn't misunderstand. What you're trying to say or take it the wrong way. I like that. What's your biggest piece of advice, Karen, for someone who feels emotionally triggered during a conversation, but still wants to have an effective communication? Recommend.
Karen:All the things that we've been talking about, and that is Reiki in advance, Reiki, for the relationship some divine guidance about what your objectives are, or the conversation Reiki afterwards, and, surrendering it to the higher power for, Or whatever, one of the situations with the landlord about the windows the windows still are not clean, and now it's winter, and I doubt that any window washer is going to want to come clean the windows this winter just going to have to let that go, and and for the trash situation in the The women's restroom that was a problem. I decided, rather than having trash spilling out all over the floor, I went and spent, 10 or 15 dollars on a new larger trash can for the restroom. And I thought, OK this will at least keep the trash contained. Since he was no longer having the cleaners come every day, but only two to three times a week, which is why the trash had gotten out of hand. Just saying, okay I tried, we requested, we follow up if we still don't get what we want what can be done, and that's an easy solution.
Pamela:I love it. And in the, anybody also who has animal Reiki masters, I'd encourage you to try the Harmony. Meditation as well that brings in I've heard from a lot of people that it created harmony from some very disharmonious situations. And I remember creating that when I had a horse who just wasn't in harmony with tears. Listening for that, yeah.
Karen:Yes, and then remembering that time out thing, particularly if the conflict happens when you're in the car driving with someone, that can be one of the most challenging situations where you really cannot get away from the person and, There's always the conflict avoiders and then the ones that just enjoy getting that adrenaline going and they just want to go for it. And, they enjoy the fight. That's not me. There are those out there that just enjoy that and get a kick out of it. And I don't know. So letting them know that, no, we cannot, I need a time out. We cannot continue talking right now. And if the conversation continues, then we're going to need to pull over so I can get out of the car and, take a short little walk or,
Pamela:Don't leave me out of the car.
Karen:Oh, that reminds me. Yes, that did happen also in my last marriage. No, I think I took a time out and yeah, he did go off and leave me and I thought, oh, okay. Silly me. I left my purse in the car.
Pamela:I can see why it's X.
Karen:Oh, boy. Just, I'm sure that everybody's had some of these difficult, challenging conversations and yeah, just with Reiki, It's better, that, that doesn't, even with Reiki, nothing is going to be perfect. There's going to be times when we mess up, when we do get triggered, and we just have to give ourselves some compassion, some grace, do our best to Give ourselves Reiki, recenter, ground, that moving meditation that I did, I like to add in the power symbol or the holy fire symbol to that, just to make it more potent, do our clearing, do our grounding. Okay what now? I said this awful thing or whatever that I didn't really mean now what? Okay, what do I need to do to apologize for that?
Pamela:Yeah, I think that's, yeah. I think that's the best course. Karen, thank you. This is so much to think about. And, before we wrap up today, I just thought we'd go into a meditation to help our listeners for some of the difficult conversations that they're probably contemplating. a result of this. I'm going to just invite everybody to go ahead and close your eyes and I'm going to invite you to place your Reiki activated hands over your heart. And just go ahead and make yourself comfortable, letting your body relax fully, with your eyes closed, taking a deep breath, and just letting go of any tension or anxiety as you exhale, any foreboding, any feelings of nervousness, and just feel the seat underneath you. Let yourself be here in this moment in time. And on every inhale, just feel the Reiki energy filling your breath, filling you with a sense of calm, peace. Harmony. And on every exhale, just continue to let go of tension and discomfort. Just imagining your breath as a beautiful wave, a peaceful wave, moving in and out and bringing you back to your center. And just take a moment to consider the earth beneath you and imagine placing your energy in the bottoms of your feet or your consciousness. And then just allow your consciousness to travel into the earth like roots. Moving deeply into the earth, all the way through the soil, into the ground water and the bedrock beneath. And just feel your roots growing deeper and deeper, grounding you, connecting with that pure living water of the earth. The stability of the bedrock and the strength moving into you. Just feeling yourself supportive and held, safe, secure. And just notice the Reiki energy now flowing into your heart. Breathe it in. Allow it to fill your entire being with light and filling your heart, your throat, your entire body. Let it move you into a state of peace and harmony, conscious harmony. Harmony within yourself and harmony with the growth that you will experience in the conversations. Harmony with the other person and with the conversation itself. Namaste. And if you're aware of any emotional blocks, any fear, any frustration, any tension, any avoidance from conversations that you need to have, You can just turn all of these blocks and barriers over to Reiki, just trusting that the energy is here to support you. And you may wish to say to yourself something like, I am grounded, I am centered, I am open to clear, compassionate communication. And don't forget to be compassionate with yourself. And just let these words resonate within you, knowing that You have the power to speak clearly, calmly, even in the most difficult moments, and Reiki can help you with that. And if you have any fears or anxieties about conversations that you need to have, just imagine them dissolving, turning into little speckles of light and floating away. Embraced and released by the Reiki energy as the light of trust moves through you and you trust that you're prepared to go into any conversation with grace and understanding and love you, you trust yourself deeply and fully. And now we just go into a moment of visualization, just imagining yourself entering the conversation with a sense of peace and confidence. Visualize yourself speaking clearly from the heart, listening deeply and responding with kindness. Feel a wave of peace and calm surround you as you speak your truth. And notice how this peace and calm, this energy extends to the person you're speaking with. And I just invite you to visualize or imagine a very harmonious, meaningful exchange. And we'll just remain here for a few moments together, just allowing this energy to settle within you. Open yourself to the growth that you'll experience by approaching this conversation in this way. Take a deep breath in, filling your entire being with Reiki. And on your next exhale, just gently bring your awareness back to this moment in time. Bring your attention to your eyes. Slowly open your eyes and return. And just know that you're ready for any conversation. You have within you the peace, the sense of calm, the clarity, and the compassion to navigate it. And Reiki is here to support you. I'd like to just encourage you to approach all interactions with your beautiful Reiki infused presence. I'd like to thank you, Karen, for being with us today and just getting this conversation about conversations started.
Karen:Thank you, Pam. That was a beautiful meditation. I appreciate you and your skill and expertise and leading that as well as guiding the conversation.
Pamela:Ah, thank you, Karen. And to all of our listeners from both Karen and I, we appreciate you, keep shining your light, keep having those Reiki filled conversations, and we look forward to seeing you again next time. Much love. Namaste. Thank you.